Whores invade high school

August 25, 2005

In other news, cheap sex is available in Canton, Ohio.

CANTON, Ohio — Shocking school administrators and others community members, fully 13 percent of the female students at an Ohio high school currently are pregnant.

According to a report in the Canton Repository, 65 girls of the 490 females at Timken High School are with child – a number confirmed by Principal Kim Redmond.

“This has gotten to horrible proportions,” said Redmond. “I wish I knew the answer to why it’s happening.”

The irony of this entire thing is that they are the Timken High Trojans. But seriously, who is surprised by this? This is America, home of the vain, where fake tits and nose jobs dominate the landscape. It’s what we live for, to look good & make money. Do you want to know why there are 65 pregnant girls at your daughter’s highschool? Because they’re whores! While your daughter is at home getting finger fucked by Bobby the Quarterback and flipping through Seventeen Magazine for tips on better blowjobs, you’re at the PTA meeting trying to figure out what’s gone wrong…and it’s really not that complicated. Our culture is shit. Look at Sex In the City: 90% of the females in this country identify with that show and it’s about a bunch of narcissistic women sipping cappucinos, discussing the new shoes they bought at Barney’s and the new penis-with-legs they fucked last night. I don’t know why anybody is trying to get to the bottom of it. Your little girls are skanky cretins living in a morally bankrupt society.

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3 Responses to “Whores invade high school”

  1. Hannah Says:

    Well, I don’t have a website so I might not be allowed to speak, but since I am a fan of Sex and the City I think you should get your facts right. They sit around drinking Cosmopolitans not cappucinos, and buy their shoes at Manolo Blanik not at Barney’s.

  2. Ted Says:

    Haha… tell him straight Hannah.

    Drew, I have to disagree with your claims on how sex on TV is ruining our society. That is analagous to saying that video game violence is making kids kill people in church and at school. While there’s a deeper underlying issue involving that argument, and I’m not going to discuss it now, I would like to add that Bobby the Quarterback has a very potent finger.

    Sex (in my opinion) is a touchy, but progressive matter that most of the world is accepting more and more freely. What is ruining American society in this instance is the fact that these conservative groups are advocating abstinence over safe sex. These dumbass kids don’t know what to do in order to properly protect themselves. Ohio, as was proven in the recent election, is a backwards, bible-beating state, and this is just another proof that right-wing philosophy sucks ass, and the beaurocrats who are responsible for the kids’ sex-ed cirriculum should all be quartered and beaten.

  3. Drew Says:

    I didn’t say sex on tv is ruining anybody because I knew some shithead like you would come along and tell me I’m wrong. I don’t think it is any one thing. What I did say was that our culture is shallow and worthless, and what we have on our television reflects that. And I do think it has something to do with these girls becoming pregnant.

    As for sex on tv or violence in video games, I’m sure they do have some sort of effect on the kids who grow up with a tv and Xbox rather than a mother and father.

    I can also go back and add in the part where Bobby the Quarterback inserts his penis after finger fucking your daughter, but I’d say that’s a bit redundant. Thanks for picking that aprt though, dick.


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