Do they really sit around and vote on this stuff?

June 23, 2005

There is one thing more important than Jesus to a good, wealthy, God-fearing American. And that is The Flag. The Flag stands for all that is good and prosperous. It stands for freedom. Freedom to live your life, become successful, buy SUVs. We have created a list of a few things you cannot do with this freedom of yours, however. Quite a few things. It’s still freedom – we promise you. You trust us, don’t you? We’ve got a catchy anthem, and after all, we have The Flag. Why wouldn’t you?

Number one on the list: You are not free to burn The Flag which stands for your freedom. That would be truly blasphemous and degrading to yourself, a free person. So don’t do it, or we’ll throw you in jail.

Aw, shucks. I love this country.

I would point out that flag burning should be the least of our concerns, but I would probably be wrong. It should be a concern for the House of Representatives. We’ve got a president known worldwide as a blundering moron, who just so happens to be plunging our country into massive debt while waging a costly and pointless war in Iraq. They should be concerned with flag burning, and a lot of it.

WASHINGTON, June 22 – The House of Representatives passed a resolution on Wednesday proposing a constitutional amendment that would enable Congress to prohibit the destruction or debasement of the flag without violating free speech rights.

The vote was 286 to 130, more than the two-thirds of the members present and voting that is required to approve a proposed amendment.

The House has passed such resolutions many times in the 16 years since the Supreme Court ruled in 1989 that the First Amendment protected flag burning, but the proposals have never passed the Senate. This year, though, the conservative tilt of the Senate has given the proposal an unusually strong chance of success. The Senate Judiciary Committee is expected to approve the resolution shortly after the Fourth of July holiday. All 50 states have already passed resolutions calling for prohibitions on debasement of the flag.

One Response to “Do they really sit around and vote on this stuff?”

  1. Ted Says:

    Hey, let’s all get together and burn the flag in our basement right next to our meth lab…haha, those bastards will never catch us.

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