…is that it lets you come in contact with all kinds of people from everywhere. That can be good, and that can be bad. In this case, I’m thinking it’s bad.


Someone showed this to me earlier. This is a page where you leave confessions. Think about that one for a second. Internet + confessions = horror. Isn’t this why they made religion, so you can do this quietly in your own home? Beg forgiveness because you secretly outbid your friend for a bicycle fork on eBay, etc etc? Guess not. Anyway, some of my “favorites”:

“In sixth grade, I instigated a fight. Two guys held the kid’s arms, my buddy punched his stomach a few times. All I did was knock the kid’s Baby Ruth out of his hand, and remember him sadly saying “aw my Baby Ruth”. I felt bad. Sorry kid. ”

“I lock myself in my girlfriend’s bathroom, rummage through her laundry basket, and sniff her mother’s underwear. I am sexually attracted to my girlfriend’s mother and have had dreams about her.”

“I`m 39 yo and for the last 17 years I have sex with my sister.
We are both married(not to eachother) but we meet 1-2 some times 3 times a week and do it. ”

“I have slept with hookers. ”

“I was at a party in college where some dude got so drunk that he went into the kitchen and shat in a frying pan and started frying up his own shit. The smell was so bad that literally everyone in the house got sick. They couldn’t get the smell out of there for weeks! That dude was me.”

“I ordered a bunch of parts to build my friend a PC, then I used the parts to upgrade my own system and gave him the older stuff from my machine. ”

“One of my co-workers bid on a bicycle fork on ebay and he really wanted it. I created a fake user ID named “Farmer Dave” and outbid him on the item at the last moment. I didn’t even want the item. Its in a cardboard box underneath my desk. ”

“when i was little i let my best (male) friend touch my balls in exchange for a swiss army knife.”

“A freind of mine asked if he could masturbate with me. I said no, and he dropped out of high school. ”

“I once had sex in a public bathroom in the handicapped stall. right when we were leaving an old guy came in with an oxygen tank on one of those carts, talk about good timing ”

“I’m afraid of heights.”

Thank god, just what we’ve always needed

What the hell is wrong with hollywood? There’s a Dawn of the Dead remake coming out soon, along with a Texas Chainsaw Massacre remake. Dont ask why, cause I don’t know. Since when is it entertaining to watch a movie and see how much it sucks compared to the first one? Sounds like a whole lot of fun. Besides, Dawn of the Dead was awesome because it was made in the 70’s, had a lot of very cheesy moments but still managed to be disgusting. “Look, it’s a shopping center!” tell me again how you’re going to improve on that? You can’t. Both DOTD and TCM were trophies of their time. And only their time. It’s like that brilliant idea to remake Psycho. You can’t sit in front of the tv with popcorn and guess what’s going to happen next. It’s fucking Psycho! Everyone’s seen it!

Sides, if you did this with anything else people would laugh at you. You can’t go copying books, changing a few things here and there and then releasing it as your own. If you did, you’d be a jackass and a plagiarist, not an artist. It seems like some sort of test to see how gullible the public is. But I was pretty sure our idiocy had already been declared when everyone rejoiced at the idea of reality TV, so what is the point? That is, aside from raking in millions of dollars from people silly enough to watch it.

Here’s something for Hollywood to chew on: original ideas. New plots and stories would be good. And heres something for America: stop being so predictable. We know you love shitty movies, but come on. I just want to grab a hold of the entire nation and shake it like one of those ‘caught on tape’ babysitters you see on Oprah. SHAKE THE BABY, SHAKE THE BABY. IT WON’T STOP CRYING!!!


October 6, 2003

When Bush JR. was elected president I started to get a little worried for our country. If this is the best man we can summon forth to head the leading superpower in the world, exactly what is going to happen to us?

At least now it’s coming to an end, and maybe somebody else will have a chance to clean up the mess. It’s like Dubya crashed our big house party, breaking furniture and snorting massive amounts of cocaine with his regime tearing shit up and doing beer bongs on top of tables. They staggered out intoxicated and now we are left to clean up after their little session. What we need now is a Latina Maid, and I think Wes Clark is just that person. Kinda.

Interview with Wesley Clark from the latest Rolling Stone

I think this is the only presidential candidate I have ever actually respected. Which is saying a lot, because it seems just about everybody running for president is a shady bastard. Clark just doesn’t come off quite as fake as all of the others, and he doesn’t appear to have some whacky agenda.

He thinks Bush is a jackass, Rumsfeld is being way too secretive, thinks our rights are being taken away from us, is actually a little worried about the environment… and doesn’t believe in war if it’s not necessary. And he was a general in the army. Can’t beat that shit! But I’m in Florida, and from what I can tell, democratic votes don’t count here. Shucks.

Well, good luck to him if he should win – he has the hefty job of getting all other countries in the world to stop screaming for American blood.

Why hasn’t anyone already thought of this? Dubbed gi joe clips. Brilliant. It’s just too bad that the next time I see a downed powerline my mind will immediately shift to thoughts of a large black man offering a full body massage, rather than the safety hazards
Oh well.